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Songtitels WEAPONS OF MASS SEDUCTION explained.

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THE SPIDER AND THE CHICKEN

 

A couple of years ago I was playing guitar in a club in Greece. In between songs an extremely pretty local girl walked up to me and she told me that I didn't just sound good, but that I was also funny to watch. She thought that when I played my right hand looked like a chicken picking on the ground and my left looked like a spider running across a hot metal plate. So the title "The Spider and the Chicken" actually refers to both my hands. By the way, always support your local groupie!

 

 

BE NICE TO MR. HILL

 

This song is about British comedian Benny Hill. Rumour has it that big Benny auditioned girls by letting them give him something I can only describe as a "sexual favour of an oral nature". During this particular act Benny would constantly repeat the words "Be nice to mr. Hill". Now, think about that next time you see one of his shows where he's surrounded by truckloads of beautiful girls! Lame show? Don't think so!

 

 

DRAWCANSIR

 

Again a song about a comedian. This song celebrates the genius of the late Andy Kaufman. Unfortunately Andy had a very short career (he died of lung cancer in 1984, when he was only 35 years old) but in that short period of time he introduced the world to a brand new sort of comedy where reality and fiction were entwined in such a bizarre way that even his audience couldn't tell what was real and what wasn't. If you've never heard of the man, do yourself a favour and google him up. By the way, the fight you hear in the middle of the song is a wrestling match between Andy and the then reigning world heavyweight champion Jerry Lawler. Afterwards Andy had to be carried out to the hospital, but again, all was not what it seemed to be, the fight was completely scripted from the get go.

 

 

MASCARA TEARS

 

A couple of years ago I was in the Gotham Club in San Bernardino California having a drink with Ty Tabor and Jerry Gaskill from King's X. All of a sudden an incredibly pretty girl walks in and it is obvious that she's been crying. Her tears had smeared out her mascara over her cheeks, but in a strange way, this made her even more beautiful to look at. Right there and then I knew that someday I would write a guitarballad for her, and sure enough, years later I did.

 

 

CYBEROTIC ACROBAT

 

One night I was watching television and on came this show that featured a guy who designed all kinds of machinery to accommodate the sexual orientated websurfer to engage in all sorts of antics of an auto-erotic nature. I'm talking helmets, gloves, glasses, strap-ons, you name it. When the guy gave a short demonstration I could not believe my eyes, he looked like a half man / half robot and it was obvious that you had to be some sort of acrobat to wear all this gear, watch the screen of your pc and still be able to push all the right buttons in order to obtain some sort of sexual excitement. You glorious fool, this song's for you!

 

 

CONFUSION

 

This song is really me seeing how far I could push my bandmates into playing a piece of music that had so many notes and strange twists that most musicians would call it a day and go home. To my big surprise they really liked the song and moreover, enjoyed playing it. It's a mental thing, there is something wrong with them for sure, but to me it was proof of the fact that I was working with the right guys. Now the capitol F in the middle of the word "ConFusion" is just to point out that there's a reason fusion music is called the way it is, it's a fine line between fusion and confusion and on this song, me, Marco, Minggus and Bert are walking this very fine line.

Last changed: 08 Jul 2008 at 08:44

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